LGBTQ self-care tips for the holidays

Lesbiannews

Dec 23

The holiday season, although meant to bring cheer and celebration, is also a time of high stress that can take its toll on anyone.

The holidays can be especially triggering for many people, and LGBTQ folk are more likely than their non-LGBTQ counterparts to experience loneliness, stress, anxiety, and depression during this time of the year.

Unique challenges LGBTQ people encounter during the holidays

Research shows that LGBTQ people are more likely to experience these symptoms year-round, but numerous mental health providers say that the holiday season can exacerbate these symptoms.

One reason is that there is an emphasis on gathering with family. Being home for the holidays can be stressful for those in the LGBTQ community, especially if their families are not welcoming and supportive.

The holidays also tend to be a time to make important announcements, but many in the LGBTQ community avoid coming out, introducing a new partner, or announcing they are transitioning due to a fear of rejection or a desire to not kill the holiday vibe.

Lastly, many members of the queer community are already suffering from limited social and family connections. And all of this can increase feelings of sadness and grief during the holidays.

Some ways LGBTQ folk can practice self-care over the holidays

There are many ways you can protect your mental health and overall well-being as you navigate the stress and tension brought about by the holiday season. Here are a few suggestions:

Ask yourself some important questions. What do you actually want to get out of the holidays? Kristina Furia, psychotherapist and owner of Emerge Wellness, suggests asking yourself: "What do you need to do, or perhaps more importantly, not do to feel good about yourself when the holidays are behind you?"
Create a mantra of self-acceptance. You should not have to revert to the older, "more hetero" version of yourself over the holidays just to keep the peace with family and/or friends. Julian Sambrano, an art therapist based in Los Angeles, recommends creating a simple mantra: "Tell yourself something like, 'I am exactly who I am supposed to be and do not need to change for anyone.' Repeat this, silently or out loud as much as needed."
Take breaks to calm down. When things become too much, it is perfectly fine to remove yourself from what is triggering you, especially to prevent a breakdown to happen later.
Be mindful of micro-aggressions and be assertive. Psychology Today defines micro-aggressions as "verbal, nonverbal, and environmental slights, snubs, or insults, whether intentional or unintentional, which communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative messages to target persons based solely upon their marginalized group membership." Speak up when you catch these micro-hostilities and set healthy boundaries.
Exercise. Get moving!
Stay connected with allies. If you're concerned about going home for the holidays, inform your friends and allies ahead of time that you may need some extra emotional support.