Attack of the Demonic Shrilling Chicken!

James Amos

April 1

Remember that rubber chicken Sena ordered as a joke for what looks like my transformation into a Svengoolie fan? Svengoolie is the longstanding host on the MeTV channel which shows old, cheesy TV horror movies every Saturday.

Svengoolie always gets a lot of rubber chickens tossed at him after he tells a few jokes. Well, the rubber chicken arrived. Actually, I think it's plastic, about which I'll have a lot more to say. It's called Shrilling Chicken. Sena ordered it from Wal-Mart. We're still waiting for the Svengoolie glow-in-the-dark T-shirt, which she ordered through the Svengoolie web site.

The chicken is about a foot long and squeals when you squeeze it. It's sold as a dog toy. It's red and yellow and the first thing I did was to try to juggle with it along with two juggling balls. I thought it would be cool to get a YouTube video of it, especially while wearing the Svengoolie T-shirt.

I was trying to get the hang of juggling a linear chicken with juggling balls and was just getting to where I could do 3 or 4 throws while also squeezing it to make it squeal. And then it happened: the demonic chicken bit me (or is "pecked me" a better way to put it?)! That's pretty spooky given the connection to Svengoolie, the horror show host.

OK, so it didn't actually peck me in a satanic manner, but I caught it awkwardly in my right hand. My right index finger swelled up and it got a little sore. It's healing quickly although it did leave a faint bruise.

Then I looked up Shrilling Chicken on the web. What a rabbit hole! I found warnings seemingly all over the web against getting within 100 yards of the thing because of allegations it contains toxic chemicals. In fact, pretty much all the warnings came from a group called Ecowaste Coalition, with the chief spokesperson being someone named Thony Dizon, Chemical Safety Campaigner.

Thony's main message is that Shrilling Chicken contains unacceptable levels of "toxic plastic additives." He cites a long list of European countries that have banned Shrilling Chicken, despite the labels on the package, one of which is "CE" which means that it meets European Union standards.

The warnings go on to say that children should not be allowed to even touch it, although there are dozens of ads on the web showing where you can buy it for kids, with one image of a child hugging a Shrilling Chicken as tall as he is. I didn't know they made them that big.

Thony also goes on to cite an "FDA Advisory No. 2020-042" which clearly is opposed to Shrilling Chicken being on this planet. I spent quite a while looking for that FDA Advisory in the U.S. FDA website. I couldn't find it.

If you don't look closely, you'll miss the part at the bottom of the page indicating that the "FDA" referred to is the one in the Philippines.

The Shrilling Chicken label also indicates that the toy is approved for kids 6 years and older. It also has the Green Dot symbol on it. Wikipedia says it's "…to indicate to consumers who see the logo that the manufacturer of the product contributes to the cost of recovery and recycling." The Shrilling Chicken is made in China.

On the whole, I would say Shrilling Chicken is less than demonic in any sense of the word. However, given what happened to me, I probably would not toss it at Svengoolie.

Also, I would suggest you not try to juggle with it. I had to lay off juggling practice briefly so I can heal up.